Sunday, October 08, 2006

On the Job Training: Motherhood - Part 18 For What There is No Training

I wanted to remember all the mothers who in the last two weeks sent their children to school and learned they would not return home.

The Amish community is very close to home for me, so the pain of their tragedy is felt deeply. And there are mothers in other parts of the US that are also grieving.

I always remember a woman who lost her son to the Columbine tragedy saying she kept her son's laundry untouched, just so she could hold onto his smell a little bit longer.

We all want to hold our children closer to us and having our hearts brutally torn is unfathomable. The Amish community has comforted themselves with "It was God's will." Yes, you can say maybe that child's purpose was to bring 8 years of joy and happiness to those around her.

There are so many senseless acts of violence against children all over the world. I've been thinking about Gandhian philosophy a lot this week and how does one turn the other cheek when there is violence against the weakest and smallest. He always said change starts with one person and I hope that can be done. We can see how many lives would have been saved and different if one person had decided not to move forward that day. It is easier to take the violent approach than the nonviolent one, which require one the face fears head on.

I cannot look at this butchery going on in the world with indifference. I have an unchangeable faith that it is beneath the dignity of men to resort to mutual slaughter. I have no doubt that there is a way out.

M. K. Gandhi


To be honest, I saw this Hindi comedy movie "Munna Bahi Lage Raho" this week. I thought it'd be another slapstick comedy, but was suprised by the theme of Gandhian philosophy -- bringing in the man himself to do the preaching. It was a great movie in that they used every day examples and how basic philosophy of truth and nonviolence do have a place in our world.

I recently helped a friend deal with a situation. She was ready to walk out, avoid confrontation with another person and give up. If she did that, it would exacerbate the situation, affect many people involved and break relationships. Remembering the lessons from this week, I told her she had two choices - either walk out or confront the other person. Walking out would be the 'violent' option and open discussion would be "nonviolent."

Fortunately she chose the latter. She found her strength by finding someone to support her during the discusssion. That's ok. We don't have to do everything in life by ourselves. (Refer to my "Confessions of a Supermom" post about having real expectations). The discussion was worthwhile and they will have to compromise and work. However, that work will be a lot easier than try to live and deal with the disasters.


Anonymous said...

[This is totally on a tangent]

With all due respect, :) you just might have royally butchered the title, "Impedence Mistmatch over HTTP."

It should read as "Impedance Mismatch over HTTP."

Impedance Mismatch is what lies in my head and spills onto the blog as commentary and opinion. You read it because the stuff reaches your favorite browser via HTTP (protocol) hence the title, "Impedance Mismatch over HTTP."

By the way, Kiran Desai won the Booker prize. Will your next blog title be "from One Desai to another?"

OK, I will shutup now.


samurai said...

OMG Ashini. I didnt know you blog. This is simply great. I am such an addict to free style commentary and there is no one, repeat no one else's writing that I'd enjoy than your's. Good to find you through clorange :)

samurai said...

I am such a sucker of surrealism - and some of your posts really makes me feel like I am reading well traslated south american poetry on that topic. Cant go back and comment on all posts, but I love 'em all so far.

Anonymous said...

Thanks so much!!

Prop - will fix the next time I'm in there. Sorry to offend. I screwed up an "a" and "e" earlier today. My typing and spelling has gone down as fast as barrel on Niagara Falls!! (I used to looking for typos on restaurant menus and now look at me!) Grr to Microsoft and SpellChecker!

Prasad (Simba?) - well translated South American poetry?? Whoa. Please provide link of who or what you're talking about. (Are you thinking of Gabriel Garcia Marquez??)

Anyway, I definitely welcome new site visitors! Check in weekly - I don't have the luxury of time to blog regularly.

Oh, reg. Kiran Desai. Um, yeah. Congratulations.
(Wrong Desai.. But really, I'm an American.. I wouldn't be eligible for a Booker she can have it. So there! :-)

Anonymous said...

But really, I'm an American.. I wouldn't be eligible for a Booker anyway..

--> Oooh. Technicality to the rescue. But seriously, I had no clue that the Booker prize was restricted to certain folks. Here is what the Booker site states:

"Now in its thirty-eighth year, the prize aims to reward the best novel of the year written by a citizen of the Commonwealth or the Republic of Ireland.

That is odd isn't it? Now, doesn't Kiran ben live in the US? Is she a British citizen then?

Man simbs, you didn't know about this blog? I thought I was the last one to know. I use this site for literary gyan, tips on parenting, and last but not the least, lots of B/W photography from a person from the victorian era who dreams about the life in the 50s.

Anonymous said...

To be honest, as a cloistered American, I never heard of Booker Prize until Ms. Arundhati Roy came along. So it seems Indian writers (from India) are eligible for this. So, is India still considered a Commonwealth??

BTW, you cracked me up about the description of my site! Seems like I should have some Bach or Dean Martin playing in the background on every page load. I think Edith Piaf would be more apt.

Anonymous said...


I will check once a week as summoned :) About the poetry - yes, I am thinking of Gabriel.

Also, when I said poems, most surreal literature, even if its prose, it evokes all the imagination that a good poem does to me. Good luck.


P.S: Word verification is "wmdkeys" :) Bush be forewarned.